FAMILY COMMUNICATION

Keys to Family Communication


I. Listening: To learn to be a good communicator, you must learn to be a good listener.
1. Be A Ready Listener: Jas. 1:19 (Contrast being swift to hear with being slow to speak. To be a good listener, you must give more attention to listening than to speaking.)
2. Look For Areas Where You May Be Wrong: Prov. 12:15 (If you fail to see that you are sometimes wrong, you are a fool!)
3. Try To Understand The Other Person's Point Of View: Prov. 18:2, 15 (If you don't seek to understand others, you are a fool. It is wise to search for knowledge and understanding in what others are saying.) I think this is particular important when you are communicating through digital media as sometimes you do not have the advantage of reading nonverbal cues to understand the other person.
4. Seek The Interests Of Others: Phil. 2:3 (This teaches us to be unselfish. Being unselfish will reflect in the way you listen to others.) 1 Cor. 10:33 (Paul left this example for us.)
II. Answering: The next step to good communication is knowing how to answer what is said to you.
1. Listen First: Prov. 18:13 (You must let the other person finish speaking before you can answer.)
2. Think First: Prov. 15:28 (Give yourself time to study your answer before responding.) Prov. 29:20 (A hasty response is of no value and exposes you as a fool.) I think that this could be extended to think before you post or text. Oftentimes when communicating through digital media, our filter that keeps our emotions and words in check is not there. Which can lead to rash decisions to type/text things in a hasty response. It is really important not to react instantaneously based solely on feelings when communicating through digital media.
3. Don't Quarrel: Prov. 17:14 (It is possible to passionately disagree without fighting.) Prov. 20:3 (Pride makes us want to keep on fighting but true honor comes to the person who stops the fight. It's harder for a person to fight when their opponent refuses to engage. Unlike war, you can refuse to fight without surrendering.)I think it is important not to fight in a digitally public environment, because then what started as a private situation involves others which can make the conflict even harder to resolve. Conflict resolution should take place in private environments as much as possible, and should remain between the involved parties.
4. Don't Seek Revenge With Your Words: Rom. 12:17, 21 (There is no place in the Christian heart for vengeance! When you respond to hurtful words with a desire to get revenge, you are sinning!)
III. Speaking: Then you must learn to express your ideas an acceptable way.
1. Tell The Truth: Rev. 21:8 (Dishonesty can cost you your soul! There is no place in communication for deceitfulness or dishonesty.)
2. Speak It With Love: Eph. 4:15 (The truth alone it not enough. It must be said with love.) 1 Cor. 13:4-8 (Love will dictate many aspects of the way we speak.)
3. Don't Tear Down: Eph. 4:29 (It is a sin to speak words for the purpose of tearing others down. If you live by the insult, you will die by the insult. If it is wrong to try to tear the other person down, how much more wrong is it to do this in the presence of others?) I think digital media provides a wonderful opportunity to be constant sources of encouragement, whether it is sending a text or posting to Facebook or Skyping a little bit of encouragement can go a long way. It also for some, may provide a less awkward way for them to be an encouragement to their family members, if they are uncomfortable with face-to-face encouragement.
4. Don't Nag: Prov. 27:15 (Nagging makes it difficult it the other person to listen to you.)

Baptism

Phillipians 2:12  

Continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling.

I have had the privilege of assisting in many baptisms and I have seen the change in the faces as they enter the water.  Even if the mood is very light before, as they enter the water they become very serious.  The importance of this moment seems to overtake them.

When they come up out of the water most smile.  They have changed.  We need to start every day with that feeling of how serious our salvation is, then go through the day with a smile from the knowledge that because of Jesus we have it!

Luke Tuccillo